Grief is Sticky

Sounds silly doesn’t it, that grief is sticky. But that is the analogy that came to me last night and so – here it is. There are many ways it is sticky and I’ll explain. 

It’s like bubble gum that gets stuck on your shoe. There you are walking along without a care in the world, when all of a sudden you step on a piece of chewed and very sticky bubble gum. What the heck! It doesn’t easily come off and now you have to deal with it for the rest of the day. It is so irritating. 

• Grief can be like that sometimes. You are not thinking about it. You are not worried about it. Then all of a sudden, it is stuck to you for the day, and you can’t scrape it off no matter how hard you try. And every time you put your shoe on after that- it is there, like an undercurrent – a subtle reminder that it will be with you – until it isn’t. 

It is sticky like a hot summer day. You know, the kind of day that is so hot that your skin is covered in a film of sweat from dawn to dusk. 

• Those days are just sweltering, and you can’t do anything to alleviate the film of grief that is covering your heart and soul. It is just impossible, and suffocating. All you can do is try to be still and endure. 

It is sticky like a child who clings to your leg. As you try to walk- they walk with you and are holding on so tight because they don’t want you to leave them. 

• It is so hard to walk on when someone is holding your legs so tight. You are torn because it is so nice that they love you so much they don’t want to let you go, but at the same time, the guilt creeps in when you try to pry them off so you can get to where you need to go. Sometimes grief walks alongside you, and sometimes, it wraps its arms around you and holds on for dear life. 

At this point, I really don’t know how to end this post, because I am not sure what else there is to say. I have just been thinking about how grief can be protean – able to change form readily; versatile and constantly shifting. That is why it affects people differently, I guess. 

For those of you reading this who are dealing with grief- new or old- I am afraid that it will inevitably be sticky in one way or another. Peace.